Each year, thousands of children are faced with harsh cruelty and neglect by their guardians, regardless of blood relation. In 2023, the Los Angeles County Department of Children and Family Services (DCFS) had 66,591 emergency response referrals, totaling 123,557 children – the majority for neglect and abuse, both physical and emotional.
April is National Child Abuse Prevention Month, a time to recognize not only how neglect can severely impact a child’s ability to form positive relationships and succeed in school, but also promote resources and services that can allow youth to heal from their trauma.
While this month may be about preventing abuse, it’s also important to remember the unfortunate victims who have died due to abusive parents. Next month will be the 11th anniversary of the death of Gabriel Fernandez, who was tortured and beaten by his mother Pearl Fernandez and her boyfriend Isauro Aguirre.
Emily Carranza, a Sylmar resident and Gabriel’s cousin spearheaded the fight to get justice for the young boy. She launched a Facebook page, Gabriel’s Justice, to preserve his legacy, fight against child abuse and support other families.
Yet, Carranza said, she is still learning what the signs of a child suffering from abuse are, as the discussion over what is considered abuse has changed over time. She noted how to Latinos in the 1970s and ’80s, smacking your child in the mouth for back talking or putting a bar of soap in their mouth for cursing would’ve been considered proper discipline. Today, more and more people would call that abuse.
“What I define as child abuse is the neglect, the punches, the visible bruises, the insults, breaking a child’s spirit, humiliation in public, favoring another child. There has to be education out there about discipline versus actual child abuse.”
While there are resources and services in the San Fernando Valley to help victims of child abuse, Carranza pointed out that adults need access to them as well. She believes that child abuse can come down to a frustrated parent, whether they’re in a marriage that’s gone sour or just feeling overwhelmed, having nowhere to release their emotions and ending up taking it out on their child.
Parents need to be willing participants when it comes to seeking therapy, Carranza said. Otherwise, the child will continue to suffer, resources or not.
“A child may still want to seek it because that’s … where they’re going to go to feel safe and feel comforted and feel that they’re being heard,” Carranza said. “But what happens when that therapy session is over and they have to go home and that abuse is still there because the parents are refusing to get the help they also need? Even though the child is getting therapy, the abuse is not ending.”
Kim Morrow-Bell, a licensed marriage and family therapist with the San Fernando Valley Community Mental Health Center, shared a similar sentiment.
Morrow-Bell is the program manager for both the Caring for Kids Child Abuse Treatment (CHAT) program and the Bullying and School Violence Advocacy program at the center. The CHAT program in particular offers short-term trauma treatment – usually around a year – and related services to youth ages 6 to 17 who have been the victim of a crime, such as abuse, neglect, domestic violence and human trafficking.
Program services include crisis intervention and stabilization, evidence-based individual/group therapy sessions, referral to community services and advocacy, preparation and support for children participating in court proceedings.
Morrow-Bell explained that when a child has been abused or neglected, the center works towards educating parents about adverse childhood experiences and how they follow the child throughout their lives.
“Our program within CHAT allows us to provide therapeutic interventions and targeted case management to not only the child, but the caregiver and any family member that is impacted by the child’s victimization,” Morrow-Bell said. “We believe that support for everyone in the family who is directly impacted is extremely important, especially the parents because oftentimes it’s the parents that are creating the environment of victimization.”
Besides educating parents, Morrow-Bell added that one of the things that can help prevent child abuse is believing children when they say they’re being neglected and making sure their voices are heard, bringing up what happened to Gabriel.
It was that case that highlighted the shortcomings of the DCFS and what happens when a child falls between the cracks. Through Gabriel’s Justice, Carranza has heard many other stories from families calling DCFS or the police about suspected child abuse, only for those calls to fall on deaf ears.
Conversely, even when social workers do respond, it doesn’t always lead to a happy resolution. Carranza explained that social workers will oftentimes treat parents or guardians as criminals despite them not having all the facts or the workers may not be invested in the child’s well-being.
If the social workers in Gabriel’s case had been taught more common sense, Carranza said, then he would be alive today.
“Sometimes the social workers play a crucial part in why they’re not trusted anymore,” Carranza said. “How do parents trust them? How do parents rely on calling DCFS to help a child being abused when social workers are just going to bully that family and try to tear it apart? Do we really trust [them] with our children to be saved?
“How is that child going to feel safe and how is that child going to know who to trust when even the social workers are being bullies themselves and causing more abuse on not just the child, but the family itself?”
If you suspect a child is being abused or neglected, Carranza advises calling the authorities and asking them to do a welfare check. If the authorities suspect the child is being abused, they will notify DCFS, who will then take the matter more seriously.
“The system is broken,” Carranza said. But she thinks the best way to start fixing it is for parents and social workers to cooperate more. She knows that parents may react defensively when someone shows up at their door for suspected child abuse – regardless of whether the accusation is true – but doing so only makes them more suspicious. Both parties being cordial with each other to show there is no abuse taking place, she said, is the best way to ensure the matter is resolved on a positive note.
Carranza also recommends parents who are feeling overwhelmed look after their well-being, and reach out to support groups or friends they can talk to.
“If they don’t have that, then they can look me up,” Carranza said. “That’s my job. That’s what I do. I want to try to support other parents as I have been supported.”
“The best advice I can give a lot of parents is when you’re having a bad day, look at your sleeping child and remember their smiling faces. Just know that at the end of the day, they trust you to take care of them because without us as parents, nobody else is going to love them the way we do.”
For more information on the CHAT program, go to https://www.movinglivesforward.org/program/caring-for-kids-child-abuse-treatment-chat-program/. You can also call 818-232-4367 or email counseling@sfvcmhc.org.
Gabriel’s Justice can be found at https://www.facebook.com/Justice4Gabriel/.